Not much to say.
Usually not blogging means my eating has been in the toilet. I'm happy to say that this time isn't the case! I've been doing pretty good in the food department, and REALLY good in the exercise department.
With everything happenin' in my vida these days, blogging ends up feeling like a chore.
Job hunt is still on. My last day is Tuesday. *I puke in my mouth every time I say that*
I took a Simply Accounting course yesterday in hopes of it getting me a job. I'm not completely panicking yet. But if we could cross some things off the wedding To Do list, I'd feel better about things.
That is all.
Thursday, April 7, 2011
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
Today's Run
Quick update.
I ran 3.5 miles this afternoon. And by "ran", I mean alternating between walking and shuffling. Oh my word, my legs felt good today...not sore at all, which was surprising. My 5 min warm-up walk was good, but the second I had to start jogging I wanted to turn around and go home! It was pretty terrible. My legs felt like lead the whole time.
But I did not give up! My time is awful. Yesterday I did .5 miles more in almost the same time. But I don't care! I burned 471 calories after work!
And now I'm Starvin' Marvin and very glad supper is in the slow cooker.
Enjoy your night!
I ran 3.5 miles this afternoon. And by "ran", I mean alternating between walking and shuffling. Oh my word, my legs felt good today...not sore at all, which was surprising. My 5 min warm-up walk was good, but the second I had to start jogging I wanted to turn around and go home! It was pretty terrible. My legs felt like lead the whole time.
But I did not give up! My time is awful. Yesterday I did .5 miles more in almost the same time. But I don't care! I burned 471 calories after work!
And now I'm Starvin' Marvin and very glad supper is in the slow cooker.
Enjoy your night!
I ended up running 4 miles yesterday, at about a 12min/mile pace. Not too shabby! I ran more than I walked which I was proud of, even if I wasn't running very fast! Small victories.
I ended the day yesterday with a chocolate peanut butter and honey sandwich. Yum.
Today's eats:
B-fast: Fail. 1/4C Steel Cut oats, 1/4C skim milk, splash of water, agave nectar, chocolate peanut butter and strawberries. Overnight Oats style. Apparently steel cut oats don't suck up liquid like regular oats do. I micro'ed it at work, but it was kinda terrible. Noted.
Lunch: Chicken and havarti sandwich on delicious white bread. Veggies on the side with some calorie wise ranch dressing. Cup of tomato juice.
Afternoon snack: Smoothie. 1C mixed fruit, 3/4C skim milk, 1 scoop protein powder
Supper: Slow cooker Tuscan Beef Stew. Probably with buns. (I'm lovin' the slow cooker this week. Enter leftovers.)
Workout: I will do a least 2 miles after work. I had planned to take a(nother) rest day, but my legs feel really good today! I don't want to push it, but I'm away this weekend and am not completely convinced I'll take advantage of the workout room at el spa!
Meeting mumsy at the spa Thursday night for the weekend, and heading into the "Big City" Friday to find her a wedding outfit and to try on my DRESS! Is it possible to lose 20 pounds by Friday? :S
Hope it's sunny where you are!
I ended the day yesterday with a chocolate peanut butter and honey sandwich. Yum.
Today's eats:
B-fast: Fail. 1/4C Steel Cut oats, 1/4C skim milk, splash of water, agave nectar, chocolate peanut butter and strawberries. Overnight Oats style. Apparently steel cut oats don't suck up liquid like regular oats do. I micro'ed it at work, but it was kinda terrible. Noted.
Lunch: Chicken and havarti sandwich on delicious white bread. Veggies on the side with some calorie wise ranch dressing. Cup of tomato juice.
Afternoon snack: Smoothie. 1C mixed fruit, 3/4C skim milk, 1 scoop protein powder
Supper: Slow cooker Tuscan Beef Stew. Probably with buns. (I'm lovin' the slow cooker this week. Enter leftovers.)
Workout: I will do a least 2 miles after work. I had planned to take a(nother) rest day, but my legs feel really good today! I don't want to push it, but I'm away this weekend and am not completely convinced I'll take advantage of the workout room at el spa!
Meeting mumsy at the spa Thursday night for the weekend, and heading into the "Big City" Friday to find her a wedding outfit and to try on my DRESS! Is it possible to lose 20 pounds by Friday? :S
Hope it's sunny where you are!
Monday, March 28, 2011
There is Diem to Carpe
Let's get down to bid-ness.
(Right now I'm fighting the cat for my last bite of sammich. I won.)
Yes, I have a lot going on right now.
Yes, the forecast is calling for SNOW again.
Yes, chips taste good.
I ain't here for excuses! I am re-committing myself to this healthy lifestyle. I will feel better, look better, and feel better about how I look!
It starts today. I just need to *care* more. I will eat clean and good for one day and worry about the next day the next.
Back to posting eats. (Almost guaranteed that when you don't see the menu there's a reason for it. I've put back an awful lot of licorice All-Sorts in the past week.)
B-fast: 2 servings of Source peach yogurt with 1/2C Go Lean, 1/2C Go Lean Crunch and a few strawberries
Lunch: Chicken and swiss sandwich on White bread (I know there is no nutritional value, but the stats aren't bad....and sometimes a sammich ain't a sammich unless it's on white bread). And a cup of tomato juice. (lunch was rushed because I came home late and had to get sups in the slow cooker. And now I'm out of swiss cheese.)
Afternoon snack: Half - full Clif Bar
WORKOUT: Treadmill, because it's too slippery/dangerous to run outside. I WILL run at least 3.1 miles today.
Supper: Perfect Pulled Pork in the slow cooker a la Jean Pare(avec accent). And a bun. And probably a salad of sorts.
Night time snack: Unsure at this point. Will depend how far I run. Before I got on the "eat everything in sight" train, I was rockin' a PB& Honey Sammich each night before bed. I've found a hobby that I can't mention until after the wedding (that may or may not have to do with bridesmaid gifts) that keeps me busy most nights. Instead of wanting to mindlessly eat all night long, I make my snack and eat it at the table just before bedtime. It's working.
Best get back to my day job.
<3PL
Think about this:
All your life you are told the things you cannot do. All your life they will say you're not good enough or strong enough or talented enough; they will say you're the wrong height or the wrong weight or the wrong type to play this or be this or achieve this. THEY WILL TELL YOU NO, a thousand times no, until all the no's become meaningless. All your life they will tell you no, quite firmly and very quickly.
AND YOU WILL TELL THEM YES.
(Right now I'm fighting the cat for my last bite of sammich. I won.)
Yes, I have a lot going on right now.
Yes, the forecast is calling for SNOW again.
Yes, chips taste good.
I ain't here for excuses! I am re-committing myself to this healthy lifestyle. I will feel better, look better, and feel better about how I look!
It starts today. I just need to *care* more. I will eat clean and good for one day and worry about the next day the next.
Back to posting eats. (Almost guaranteed that when you don't see the menu there's a reason for it. I've put back an awful lot of licorice All-Sorts in the past week.)
B-fast: 2 servings of Source peach yogurt with 1/2C Go Lean, 1/2C Go Lean Crunch and a few strawberries
Lunch: Chicken and swiss sandwich on White bread (I know there is no nutritional value, but the stats aren't bad....and sometimes a sammich ain't a sammich unless it's on white bread). And a cup of tomato juice. (lunch was rushed because I came home late and had to get sups in the slow cooker. And now I'm out of swiss cheese.)
Afternoon snack: Half - full Clif Bar
WORKOUT: Treadmill, because it's too slippery/dangerous to run outside. I WILL run at least 3.1 miles today.
Supper: Perfect Pulled Pork in the slow cooker a la Jean Pare(avec accent). And a bun. And probably a salad of sorts.
Night time snack: Unsure at this point. Will depend how far I run. Before I got on the "eat everything in sight" train, I was rockin' a PB& Honey Sammich each night before bed. I've found a hobby that I can't mention until after the wedding (that may or may not have to do with bridesmaid gifts) that keeps me busy most nights. Instead of wanting to mindlessly eat all night long, I make my snack and eat it at the table just before bedtime. It's working.
Best get back to my day job.
<3PL
Think about this:
All your life you are told the things you cannot do. All your life they will say you're not good enough or strong enough or talented enough; they will say you're the wrong height or the wrong weight or the wrong type to play this or be this or achieve this. THEY WILL TELL YOU NO, a thousand times no, until all the no's become meaningless. All your life they will tell you no, quite firmly and very quickly.
AND YOU WILL TELL THEM YES.
Saturday, March 26, 2011
Paper Bag Breathing
I've been a bad little blogger as of late. I've been slacking and haven't felt like posting. I'm planning meals, but eating a lot of extra crap that won't make it easier to breathe in my dress. I'm running a bit, but I'm not on track with where I should be for the race.
I quit my job. On April 15, one month shy of my 5 year anniversary with the company, my termination kicks in. Yikes. Let's call it my resignation. I don't have a job lined up and I'm not *technically* qualified for anything. University degree? Check! Office Ed certificate? Nope. Looks like there won't be a job with the health region anytime soon.
I've got a few options. I've applied for a few and will apply for a few more. I might waitress at a golf course for the summer and make some tips. Maybe something fantastic will come up in the next three weeks while I'm doing *just enough* work for my boss not to let me go sooner. (I don't get paid for anything I sell after my resignation date.)
We got our wedding invitations out. My dress is in. Now we have a list two pages long (albeit the paper is small) of things we have to do/decide/discuss. The wedding is 15 weeks away. Holy moly.
One might say I'm a touch overwhelmed. I can't even think about the next 15 weeks because, not even including wedding stuff, I have to be at 2 stagettes, 1-2 showers, a race, a concert, Relay for Life, a hockey draft in Hodge, potentially a weekend at home and one at the lake. Did I mention that only one or two of those things are happening here? Did I also mention gas is $119.99/litre? And that I don't have a job?
Where's my paper bag. I'm hyperventilating.
I know that these are all little things, but so many little things happening at the same time are causing me to be very close to panic attacks. I know things will work out. I know I'll get through all of the events. I keep adding things on, but these are the things I want to do most. No, it doesn't make sense for me to do a 12 hour, over-night relay 5 hours from where I live when I will have to work the day after. But it's in honor of the best woman I know, and with my best friend. I'd rather do that than a few other things on my list (except Elton John. Sorry Red.)
I need to find a balance between all these things and make sure I don't become Bridezilla, and make sure things stay fab between me and D.
Which they are. Fab that is. The day I gave my notice at work became the beginning of great things for us. We met when I worked for the same company as I do now, just in a different city. I've never loved my job. For the past 5 years I've stayed because I felt like I owed them, because they were very good to me when my life fell apart. I'll never know how much was the company, and how much was my boss himself, but I've felt indebted to them this whole time. I finally realized that five years is much too long to feel like you owe someone, and I can't continue to be unhappy for someone else. And I've felt *mostly* awesome since it happened, and we've both been happier people. I feel like I did five and a half years ago, when things were easier.
And even with all the things to do, places to go, people to see, and jobs to find, it's a great feeling.
I quit my job. On April 15, one month shy of my 5 year anniversary with the company, my termination kicks in. Yikes. Let's call it my resignation. I don't have a job lined up and I'm not *technically* qualified for anything. University degree? Check! Office Ed certificate? Nope. Looks like there won't be a job with the health region anytime soon.
I've got a few options. I've applied for a few and will apply for a few more. I might waitress at a golf course for the summer and make some tips. Maybe something fantastic will come up in the next three weeks while I'm doing *just enough* work for my boss not to let me go sooner. (I don't get paid for anything I sell after my resignation date.)
We got our wedding invitations out. My dress is in. Now we have a list two pages long (albeit the paper is small) of things we have to do/decide/discuss. The wedding is 15 weeks away. Holy moly.
One might say I'm a touch overwhelmed. I can't even think about the next 15 weeks because, not even including wedding stuff, I have to be at 2 stagettes, 1-2 showers, a race, a concert, Relay for Life, a hockey draft in Hodge, potentially a weekend at home and one at the lake. Did I mention that only one or two of those things are happening here? Did I also mention gas is $119.99/litre? And that I don't have a job?
Where's my paper bag. I'm hyperventilating.
I know that these are all little things, but so many little things happening at the same time are causing me to be very close to panic attacks. I know things will work out. I know I'll get through all of the events. I keep adding things on, but these are the things I want to do most. No, it doesn't make sense for me to do a 12 hour, over-night relay 5 hours from where I live when I will have to work the day after. But it's in honor of the best woman I know, and with my best friend. I'd rather do that than a few other things on my list (except Elton John. Sorry Red.)
I need to find a balance between all these things and make sure I don't become Bridezilla, and make sure things stay fab between me and D.
Which they are. Fab that is. The day I gave my notice at work became the beginning of great things for us. We met when I worked for the same company as I do now, just in a different city. I've never loved my job. For the past 5 years I've stayed because I felt like I owed them, because they were very good to me when my life fell apart. I'll never know how much was the company, and how much was my boss himself, but I've felt indebted to them this whole time. I finally realized that five years is much too long to feel like you owe someone, and I can't continue to be unhappy for someone else. And I've felt *mostly* awesome since it happened, and we've both been happier people. I feel like I did five and a half years ago, when things were easier.
And even with all the things to do, places to go, people to see, and jobs to find, it's a great feeling.
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
OWW!
Thoughts from today's run:
1. If it looks calf-deep, it's probably knee-deep.
2. At 6:15, it's probably cold.
3. If you leave your soaked shoes in the sunshine-less garage, they will still be wet the next day.
4. Knee-deep puddles make your feet feel like blocks of ice.
5. Supper should be made before the run, to be eaten after the run.
I never found a groove today. I was cold, tired, and almost peed myself twice. Oh.
6. Don't drink 2 giant bottles of water an hour before running. And if you do...
7. Stay close to home.
Supper is a teriyaki beef and brown rice skillet thing. It's ok. It burned my tongue.
Tonight shall consist of What Not to Wear and addressing invitations.
Best get a move on!
1. If it looks calf-deep, it's probably knee-deep.
2. At 6:15, it's probably cold.
3. If you leave your soaked shoes in the sunshine-less garage, they will still be wet the next day.
4. Knee-deep puddles make your feet feel like blocks of ice.
5. Supper should be made before the run, to be eaten after the run.
I never found a groove today. I was cold, tired, and almost peed myself twice. Oh.
6. Don't drink 2 giant bottles of water an hour before running. And if you do...
7. Stay close to home.
Supper is a teriyaki beef and brown rice skillet thing. It's ok. It burned my tongue.
Tonight shall consist of What Not to Wear and addressing invitations.
Best get a move on!
Monday, March 14, 2011
Windy Run
I have to make this short. I'm starving. And there's a pita waiting for me in the fridge.
Did 5 miles again today. 1:09:14!! Three full minutes faster!
Things I noticed:
-- There is way too much water in this city. With nowhere to go. Except in my shoes.
-- My socks are surprisingly absorbent.
-- It takes me a good three miles to get into a groove. I feel great for the last two, but the first three seem to take forever.
-- Five miles is a good distance. 8km. I'm making up my own training plan. Right now, it's "run 5 miles faster than the time before". After two runs, it seems to be going ok. Once I can run longer and walk less I'll up the mileage. I only have 1.2-ish miles further.
Yesterday I would run for one minute, walk for two minutes. Today I ran for one minute, walked for 1.5 minutes, and once every 15 minutes I walked for two minutes. At 40km/hour, the wind was just a bit much today.
My leggies need to rest, but the forecast is calling for +3 and sunshine tomorrow, and +1 and RAIN on Wednesday. I think Wed is a good rest day. Plus, D is in the big city for training tomorrow night and I will want something to do.
Maybe I can address the 200 wedding invitations sitting on the counter....
Pita time!!
Did 5 miles again today. 1:09:14!! Three full minutes faster!
Things I noticed:
-- There is way too much water in this city. With nowhere to go. Except in my shoes.
-- My socks are surprisingly absorbent.
-- It takes me a good three miles to get into a groove. I feel great for the last two, but the first three seem to take forever.
-- Five miles is a good distance. 8km. I'm making up my own training plan. Right now, it's "run 5 miles faster than the time before". After two runs, it seems to be going ok. Once I can run longer and walk less I'll up the mileage. I only have 1.2-ish miles further.
Yesterday I would run for one minute, walk for two minutes. Today I ran for one minute, walked for 1.5 minutes, and once every 15 minutes I walked for two minutes. At 40km/hour, the wind was just a bit much today.
My leggies need to rest, but the forecast is calling for +3 and sunshine tomorrow, and +1 and RAIN on Wednesday. I think Wed is a good rest day. Plus, D is in the big city for training tomorrow night and I will want something to do.
Maybe I can address the 200 wedding invitations sitting on the counter....
Pita time!!
Sunday, March 13, 2011
Record Weekend
I broke two records this weekend:
1. I spent 4.5 hours talking on the phone Saturday night. Excuse me? Four and a half hours? Couldn't believe it. But it felt like I spent the entire evening hanging out with my bff, so it's cool.
2. I did 5 miles outside. Longest outside run. I've done a wee bit longer on the treadmill, but running outside is so very different.
I feel awesome. It took me 1:12:23. Something to work on. I would run a minute, walk two, because I'm still not completely healthy (and I was scared I would fall on the mucho ice that is covering most sidewalks.
I updated my Ipod prior to heading out and found a few gems for running to:
Hold On -- Good Charlotte (words to live by)
Open Road Song -- Eve 6
All These Things I've Done -- the Killers
Now with that out of the way I can spend the rest of the day hanging with D and Roger!
Enjoy your sunny Sunday!
1. I spent 4.5 hours talking on the phone Saturday night. Excuse me? Four and a half hours? Couldn't believe it. But it felt like I spent the entire evening hanging out with my bff, so it's cool.
2. I did 5 miles outside. Longest outside run. I've done a wee bit longer on the treadmill, but running outside is so very different.
I feel awesome. It took me 1:12:23. Something to work on. I would run a minute, walk two, because I'm still not completely healthy (and I was scared I would fall on the mucho ice that is covering most sidewalks.
I updated my Ipod prior to heading out and found a few gems for running to:
Hold On -- Good Charlotte (words to live by)
Open Road Song -- Eve 6
All These Things I've Done -- the Killers
Now with that out of the way I can spend the rest of the day hanging with D and Roger!
Enjoy your sunny Sunday!
Thursday, March 10, 2011
Thursday
There's good food at Pennie's house today!
B-fast
Overnight Oats! (1/3C Large flake oats, 1/3C skim milk, 1/3-ishC water, half a "should have been tossed 3 days ago" banana, 1/4C raisins. 4 humungo strawberries added this morning) Mix it all in a tupperware dish (since I transport) the night before and by morning the liquid has soaked into the raw oats. It's good, if you can get your head around cold oats!
Lunch
Leftover hamburger
Salad made with radishes and lettuce from a bag (why does it always taste like the bag?)
Pear
Since the rest of the day is planned, I won't bore you with a supper post later.
Afternoon snack
Grapes
1/2 a chocolate almond fudge Clif bar because....
Exercise
I'm going running after work! It's PLUS 2 today! My lungs aren't completely back to normal so I'll have to take it easy, but I'm pumped to get out there! And half a Clif bar is a good pre-workout snack for me.
Supper
1.5 Cups of Chili! So easy. It's like the chunky chicken chili I raved about a month ago, but with extra lean ground beef. I made it in the slow cooker last night so we just have to heat it up at supper time tonight. It's not as good as Jean-O's (she makes a mean chili) but it's easy and doesn't involve a dozen of cans having to be opened...just 4.
Think on this: If money didn't matter, what would you do? I think I'd go back to school for nutrition. Or, you know, be a nanny to a couple red heads!
B-fast
Overnight Oats! (1/3C Large flake oats, 1/3C skim milk, 1/3-ishC water, half a "should have been tossed 3 days ago" banana, 1/4C raisins. 4 humungo strawberries added this morning) Mix it all in a tupperware dish (since I transport) the night before and by morning the liquid has soaked into the raw oats. It's good, if you can get your head around cold oats!
Lunch
Leftover hamburger
Salad made with radishes and lettuce from a bag (why does it always taste like the bag?)
Pear
Since the rest of the day is planned, I won't bore you with a supper post later.
Afternoon snack
Grapes
1/2 a chocolate almond fudge Clif bar because....
Exercise
I'm going running after work! It's PLUS 2 today! My lungs aren't completely back to normal so I'll have to take it easy, but I'm pumped to get out there! And half a Clif bar is a good pre-workout snack for me.
Supper
1.5 Cups of Chili! So easy. It's like the chunky chicken chili I raved about a month ago, but with extra lean ground beef. I made it in the slow cooker last night so we just have to heat it up at supper time tonight. It's not as good as Jean-O's (she makes a mean chili) but it's easy and doesn't involve a dozen of cans having to be opened...just 4.
Think on this: If money didn't matter, what would you do? I think I'd go back to school for nutrition. Or, you know, be a nanny to a couple red heads!
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
Sur la table
Today's eats:
Breakfast
3/4C honey nut cheerios
10 mini-wheats
Source Exotic yogurt
Lunch
Egg salad sandwich (2 eggs, 1T calorie wise coleslaw dressing) on some weird bread from Safeway.
Pear ----> I realized my love for pears last summer and they're starting to not be complete crap again!
*no afternoon snack because I came home for lunch, got freaked out because D forgot to lock the door, then scurried back to eat lunch at my desk
Supper
Homemade hamburger (extra lean ground beef, onion, safeway saltines)
Roasted baby white potatoes
Nighttime Snack
Peanut butter and honey sandwich
Orange
Fairly normal day. Tomorrow's breakfast is not cereal for the first time in a few weeks....stay tuned!
Something to think about: Within literally 3 minutes I got a text from two different friends saying they missed me. I MISS YOU TOO! I realized if I could be anywhere right now, it would be on a farm with two dogs, some bulls and horses, and three red-heads inside (with a stop in the big city on the way through to see the best pal). Where would you be?
Breakfast
3/4C honey nut cheerios
10 mini-wheats
Source Exotic yogurt
Lunch
Egg salad sandwich (2 eggs, 1T calorie wise coleslaw dressing) on some weird bread from Safeway.
Pear ----> I realized my love for pears last summer and they're starting to not be complete crap again!
*no afternoon snack because I came home for lunch, got freaked out because D forgot to lock the door, then scurried back to eat lunch at my desk
Supper
Homemade hamburger (extra lean ground beef, onion, safeway saltines)
Roasted baby white potatoes
Nighttime Snack
Peanut butter and honey sandwich
Orange
Fairly normal day. Tomorrow's breakfast is not cereal for the first time in a few weeks....stay tuned!
Something to think about: Within literally 3 minutes I got a text from two different friends saying they missed me. I MISS YOU TOO! I realized if I could be anywhere right now, it would be on a farm with two dogs, some bulls and horses, and three red-heads inside (with a stop in the big city on the way through to see the best pal). Where would you be?
Tuesday, March 8, 2011
Like Forrest...
I just want to RUN! I'm having dreams about running half-marathons (which I'm not planning on doing until Feb/12). In the dreams, my friend is ready to go and I can't find my socks or need to grab my Garmin, and then we run through a building and get in an elevator and are supposed to know to turn left leaving the elevator. It's bizarre.
But I want to run! I walked to the library after work (and froze my little nose) and that was the best I could do. I know I can't push it or I could really be in trouble. I just feel like I'm losing training time (the 10k is May 15) and it still takes me 37ish minutes to run 5k. I have goals for my first race, and it's not to collapse in a heap 3 meters before the finish line :D
Perhaps I can chalk this up to cabin fever. The next few days are supposed to hover around zero and if the sun shines it will do all of us a world of good. I've heard this cold will last through an entire dosage ofsugar pills amoxicillin, require a second trip to the doctor, then a $40 prescription before finally easing up. I guess I'm in it for another week and should pipe down.
On another note, I realized yesterday that if I recommit now, I can still make my goal weight by the wedding. I need to lose 1.5 pounds per week and it will happen. Tall orders, but I'm thinking of it as 3 pounds every two weeks to make myself feel better.
Speaking of feeling better...good night!
But I want to run! I walked to the library after work (and froze my little nose) and that was the best I could do. I know I can't push it or I could really be in trouble. I just feel like I'm losing training time (the 10k is May 15) and it still takes me 37ish minutes to run 5k. I have goals for my first race, and it's not to collapse in a heap 3 meters before the finish line :D
Perhaps I can chalk this up to cabin fever. The next few days are supposed to hover around zero and if the sun shines it will do all of us a world of good. I've heard this cold will last through an entire dosage of
On another note, I realized yesterday that if I recommit now, I can still make my goal weight by the wedding. I need to lose 1.5 pounds per week and it will happen. Tall orders, but I'm thinking of it as 3 pounds every two weeks to make myself feel better.
Speaking of feeling better...good night!
Monday, March 7, 2011
Cough Cough, Sniffle Sniffle
If there's anything to make me not want to work out and eat well, it's being sick.
If I actually have the energy to exercise, it's thrown out the window by not being able to breathe.
If I actually have the energy to meal plan, grocery shop, and cook nutritious meals, it's thrown out the window by lack of taste buds and cravings for chicken soup and box salt and vinegar chips (aka sick chips).
So here I sit. Day 8 of being without a sense of smell, enough energy only to walk up half the stairs at work, and a voice that makes me sound like either a man or a phone sex operator.
It's snowing again. I just want the sun to shine, the snow to melt, and to be able to run outside.
After this pity party, I just remembered that a friend of a friend is having a biopsy today to determine if she has cancer. I've been brought back down to earth. There but for the grace of God go I. I'm thinking of y'all today.
Something to think about:
"When things are bad, we take comfort in the thought that they could always get worse. And when they are, we find hope in the thought that things are so bad they have to get better." -- Malcolm Forbes
If I actually have the energy to exercise, it's thrown out the window by not being able to breathe.
If I actually have the energy to meal plan, grocery shop, and cook nutritious meals, it's thrown out the window by lack of taste buds and cravings for chicken soup and box salt and vinegar chips (aka sick chips).
So here I sit. Day 8 of being without a sense of smell, enough energy only to walk up half the stairs at work, and a voice that makes me sound like either a man or a phone sex operator.
It's snowing again. I just want the sun to shine, the snow to melt, and to be able to run outside.
After this pity party, I just remembered that a friend of a friend is having a biopsy today to determine if she has cancer. I've been brought back down to earth. There but for the grace of God go I. I'm thinking of y'all today.
Something to think about:
"When things are bad, we take comfort in the thought that they could always get worse. And when they are, we find hope in the thought that things are so bad they have to get better." -- Malcolm Forbes
Friday, February 25, 2011
Thoughts So Far
So far? I love tracking via Daily Burn. I really like being conscious, not just of what I'm eating, but of protein, fat, etc. I didn't know how much fat I was eating before, and lemme tell ya...it probably wasn't pretty. Something else I like is the widget on the bottom that tells me "at this rate, you'll lose Xlbs per day and then X pounds per month. I'm intrigued to see how close it is Monday morning. Pending the weekend of course. I'm going to try really hard to track everything, exercise tomorrow morning (the only time I'll have!), and stay out of the junk cupboard.
Home does not equal holidays. I do not need to eat like it's Christmas dinner. Fruit tastes good. I enjoy salads. Sunday we will be on the road most of the day and not in the kitchen. Good choices, good choices, good choices.
Have a great weekend!
Home does not equal holidays. I do not need to eat like it's Christmas dinner. Fruit tastes good. I enjoy salads. Sunday we will be on the road most of the day and not in the kitchen. Good choices, good choices, good choices.
Have a great weekend!
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
Experiment
Last week I upped my activity levels by quite a bit. I tried to eat a bit more to compensate, but I'm struggling with the 10k training vs. weight loss. I know I need to fuel my runs, but it seems to defeat the purpose of trying to lose weight!
I'm doing an experiment this week. Last week I lost .2 pounds, and I was disappointed. But, it's also that special time of the month where I get to feel like I'm carrying 5 pounds of bloat in my stomach.
Back to the experiment. Instead of tracking through Weight Watchers, I'm going to use Daily Burn to track everything, including exercise. The site is free to use (there is a paid upgrade available that I will not be using). It keeps track of calories, fat, protein, and carbohydrates and tells you how much of each you should be getting daily. I'm pretty sure part of my problem last week was not enough protein, and I have no idea how much of everything else I should be eating. I'll see how this week goes. I like that I know how many grams of protein I will be getting by tracking in the same way as I was before (I do WW online). Another plus -- it has a boatload of food to search through. Brand names of things, including Safeway/Eating Right!
I'm hoping to keep track of how I feel during the day. One thing I've noticed already (today is day one by the way) is I'm eating way more calories. The real test will be breakfast. I'm planning 1C Kashi Go Lean, 1/2C blueberries, and 2 Silhouette pineapple (when the eff did yogurt go up to $9 by the way??) Lunch will be about the same, as will snacks and supper. Usually I'm really hungry by lunch, but I don't usually eat that much in the morning.
Like I said, I'll see.
Make this asap.
Smoothie
1C Frozen fruit (I used Europe's Best Antioxidant Blend because it has cherries!!)
1/2 small frozen banana (when my bananas are starting to brown I cut them up and put them in the tupperware dish in the freezer to use in smoothies)
1 Scoop Whey Gourmet Vanilla Ice Cream protein powder
1C skim milk
It was fantastic. I've never made a smoothie I really like before, but I think I've got it. I think I would leave out the banana next time. It's very subtle, but doesn't mesh very well with the vanilla flavor from the protein powder.
In other news, I finally found the courage to change the things I can. I don't want to elaborate yet, but there might be changes on the horizon.
I'm doing an experiment this week. Last week I lost .2 pounds, and I was disappointed. But, it's also that special time of the month where I get to feel like I'm carrying 5 pounds of bloat in my stomach.
Back to the experiment. Instead of tracking through Weight Watchers, I'm going to use Daily Burn to track everything, including exercise. The site is free to use (there is a paid upgrade available that I will not be using). It keeps track of calories, fat, protein, and carbohydrates and tells you how much of each you should be getting daily. I'm pretty sure part of my problem last week was not enough protein, and I have no idea how much of everything else I should be eating. I'll see how this week goes. I like that I know how many grams of protein I will be getting by tracking in the same way as I was before (I do WW online). Another plus -- it has a boatload of food to search through. Brand names of things, including Safeway/Eating Right!
I'm hoping to keep track of how I feel during the day. One thing I've noticed already (today is day one by the way) is I'm eating way more calories. The real test will be breakfast. I'm planning 1C Kashi Go Lean, 1/2C blueberries, and 2 Silhouette pineapple (when the eff did yogurt go up to $9 by the way??) Lunch will be about the same, as will snacks and supper. Usually I'm really hungry by lunch, but I don't usually eat that much in the morning.
Like I said, I'll see.
Make this asap.
Smoothie
1C Frozen fruit (I used Europe's Best Antioxidant Blend because it has cherries!!)
1/2 small frozen banana (when my bananas are starting to brown I cut them up and put them in the tupperware dish in the freezer to use in smoothies)
1 Scoop Whey Gourmet Vanilla Ice Cream protein powder
1C skim milk
It was fantastic. I've never made a smoothie I really like before, but I think I've got it. I think I would leave out the banana next time. It's very subtle, but doesn't mesh very well with the vanilla flavor from the protein powder.
In other news, I finally found the courage to change the things I can. I don't want to elaborate yet, but there might be changes on the horizon.
Friday, February 11, 2011
Toe Truck
Instead of running outside the last couple of days, I've been hobbling around with a cut toe! Wed evening I came home from work and was setting up the 30 day shred in the upstairs living room. It takes forever to get to the actual workout, so I started the DVD and was heading into the kitchen to get water and weights (canned tomatoes!). I guess I was a little too excited. I was sprinting up the two steps and ended up kicking the metal plate and slicing my toe. It hurts ... a lot. And now my ankle hurts because I've been walking on the outer part of my foot. Murphy's Law (why is it always Murph's fault?)
I'm flyin' solo tonight because I don't want to spend another weekend at the rink, so I'm going to (move the baseboards) and bring out the bike. I think my darn foot should be able to handle that. And really, what's better than watching "Say Yes to the Dress" whilst biking?
Food's been spot on so far this week. I hear there's a party after tomorrow night's game, which should prove to be interesting. Hence why I wanted to get some exercise in!
Grocery shopping after work. I've decided I really like meal planning for weekends, whether D is around or not. Tonight I'm having amazing pizza (again) and I think that's what will happen tomorrow night too. D works tomorrow so will have to wolf something down before we hit the highway. Also up this week is chunky chicken chili, because it was such a hit last weekend! And Monday we get to go out for supper! D got us tickets to see Colin Raye so I said I'd get supper.
Happy sunny Friday!
I'm flyin' solo tonight because I don't want to spend another weekend at the rink, so I'm going to (move the baseboards) and bring out the bike. I think my darn foot should be able to handle that. And really, what's better than watching "Say Yes to the Dress" whilst biking?
Food's been spot on so far this week. I hear there's a party after tomorrow night's game, which should prove to be interesting. Hence why I wanted to get some exercise in!
Grocery shopping after work. I've decided I really like meal planning for weekends, whether D is around or not. Tonight I'm having amazing pizza (again) and I think that's what will happen tomorrow night too. D works tomorrow so will have to wolf something down before we hit the highway. Also up this week is chunky chicken chili, because it was such a hit last weekend! And Monday we get to go out for supper! D got us tickets to see Colin Raye so I said I'd get supper.
Happy sunny Friday!
Wednesday, February 9, 2011
Lovin' the 'zza
I'm a big fan of pizza. I love it sans meat, with pineapple, mushrooms, and, if I'm in the mood, black olives or green pepper. Yes, this makes sharing pizza a nightmare. What I don't love about pizza is the nutritional info. (Also onions.)
I was cruisin the aisles of the Co-op last Thursday and at the end of the frozen foods section was a sign that said "NEW". It was McCain's thin crust Roasted Mushroom and Garlic pizza. Drool. Give me garlic on a cardboard box and I'd probably eat it. I avoided eye contact with the price tag and threw it in the cart before rushing off to find milk for Roger D.
Last night I made the pizza. It's freaking awesome! Half the pizza is 8 points. Don't mind if I do!
In exercise news, I've been doing the Couch to 5K, to build up my running ability to train for a 10K in May. Each week the ratio of jogging:walking changes, obviously adding longer periods of jogging and shorter periods of walking.
Last May I did a 5K fun run with a friend. It took me about 45 mins (still a smoker at this point). Yesterday I did 5K in 37:23! I pretty much hate running because it's hard, and I don't like things I'm not good at. What I do like is seeing myself improve. Last week jogging for three minutes at a time was tough and then I got to walk for 3 minutes. Last night I jogged for 5 minutes, and only walked for 2.5 after. It's awesome to see my pace come down and know that I'm still a beginner.
I am weary of one thing. All of my training so far has been done on the treadmill. I'm worried that when I get outside it will change drastically. Starting tomorrow until Tuesday it's supposed to be 0 and above, so the plan is to take to the streets. (I like being outside better because my Garmin > the treadmill calorie counter.) Plus, we have 15 - 12' baseboards in the middle of the living room with no place for a treadmill. But don't get me started on that.
I was cruisin the aisles of the Co-op last Thursday and at the end of the frozen foods section was a sign that said "NEW". It was McCain's thin crust Roasted Mushroom and Garlic pizza. Drool. Give me garlic on a cardboard box and I'd probably eat it. I avoided eye contact with the price tag and threw it in the cart before rushing off to find milk for Roger D.
Last night I made the pizza. It's freaking awesome! Half the pizza is 8 points. Don't mind if I do!
In exercise news, I've been doing the Couch to 5K, to build up my running ability to train for a 10K in May. Each week the ratio of jogging:walking changes, obviously adding longer periods of jogging and shorter periods of walking.
Last May I did a 5K fun run with a friend. It took me about 45 mins (still a smoker at this point). Yesterday I did 5K in 37:23! I pretty much hate running because it's hard, and I don't like things I'm not good at. What I do like is seeing myself improve. Last week jogging for three minutes at a time was tough and then I got to walk for 3 minutes. Last night I jogged for 5 minutes, and only walked for 2.5 after. It's awesome to see my pace come down and know that I'm still a beginner.
I am weary of one thing. All of my training so far has been done on the treadmill. I'm worried that when I get outside it will change drastically. Starting tomorrow until Tuesday it's supposed to be 0 and above, so the plan is to take to the streets. (I like being outside better because my Garmin > the treadmill calorie counter.) Plus, we have 15 - 12' baseboards in the middle of the living room with no place for a treadmill. But don't get me started on that.
Monday, February 7, 2011
Overwhelmed
I feel like I'm being pulled in a dozen different directions these days.
Between trying to decide what to do about my job, renovating the house for a potential move, planning the wedding, exercising, and planning/cooking/eating healthy meals, I feel like I can't breathe sometimes.
It seems like everything is based on something else. I can't really decide on what to do about my job until we know what we're doing. (AKA I can't find a new job until I know when/where we're moving). I can't exercise easily when there are baseboards lying in the middle of the living room (running outside is not an option right now). We can't put baseboards up until we paint them. We can only paint so many at a time.....
I had a terrible eating weekend. Supper Saturday night was chicken fingers and fries, straight out of the rink's deep fryer. Yesterday I ate a bunch of Chinese food and dill pickle chips. This morning I was up 2 pounds. Saw that coming. Couldn't do anything about it.
I need to really figure out what I want, in many different aspects of my vida. I know I'm unhappy with how I look and how my clothes fit. I know I feel better when I rid myself of chaos, and yet I just keep making more for myself.
Looks like someone has a case of the Mondays...
Pennie Lane
Between trying to decide what to do about my job, renovating the house for a potential move, planning the wedding, exercising, and planning/cooking/eating healthy meals, I feel like I can't breathe sometimes.
It seems like everything is based on something else. I can't really decide on what to do about my job until we know what we're doing. (AKA I can't find a new job until I know when/where we're moving). I can't exercise easily when there are baseboards lying in the middle of the living room (running outside is not an option right now). We can't put baseboards up until we paint them. We can only paint so many at a time.....
I had a terrible eating weekend. Supper Saturday night was chicken fingers and fries, straight out of the rink's deep fryer. Yesterday I ate a bunch of Chinese food and dill pickle chips. This morning I was up 2 pounds. Saw that coming. Couldn't do anything about it.
I need to really figure out what I want, in many different aspects of my vida. I know I'm unhappy with how I look and how my clothes fit. I know I feel better when I rid myself of chaos, and yet I just keep making more for myself.
Looks like someone has a case of the Mondays...
Pennie Lane
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
Chicken Tortilla Bake
Things are good over here. Food is good. Exercise is good. Haven't felt like blogging (work has been a little stressful...on days like that blogging feels like a chore).
I had a FANTASTIC Saturday. Met my bridesmaids in the big city ; ) to look for dresses and it was the most ridiculously easy shopping trip ever. It only took an hour so I even made it to the Running Room for new sneakers before heading home. (Heading home to each a bunch of crap. I think I miscalculated my activity points and didn't get enough food during the week. Regardless of this, I was down 3.3 pounds Monday morning!)
Sunday I woke up at eleven which is almost unheard of. Did 3 miles on the treadmill in my new sneaks! I love them! I can't wait until it warms up outside. I hate the treadmill, but am definately not going to brave the SK windchill.
Monday night I did another 3 miles on the treadmill. It was terrible. I didn't wait long enough after eating to run and I felt like puking the whole time. Lesson learned.
Last night I did the 30 day shred. It kicks my butt every time. I will do it faithfully twice, and then stop for months on end. I need to stop this! I've never made it to level two!
I'm taking the night off from exercise because...D is home! First night together since Saturday.
As for food this week, it's been kind of boring. I'm really enjoying jam and cheese sandwiches! Tonight's supper takes the cake.
EZ Chicken Tortilla Bake (adapted from a cookbook D got me for Christmas that doesn't really have a title)
can of condensed tomato soup
1/2C skim milk
1C salsa
2C cooked chicken (or 1.5C if that's all you can get off the damn bird)
1C cheese, divided
8 med. tortillas, cut into 1 inch pieces
Preheat oven to 400*. Mix together soup, milk, salsa, chicken, tortillas, and 1/2C of the cheese in a 2 quart baking dish. (1.5 is definately too small.) Cover and bake for 30 minutes. Top with remaining 1/2C cheese. Serves 4.
I had a FANTASTIC Saturday. Met my bridesmaids in the big city ; ) to look for dresses and it was the most ridiculously easy shopping trip ever. It only took an hour so I even made it to the Running Room for new sneakers before heading home. (Heading home to each a bunch of crap. I think I miscalculated my activity points and didn't get enough food during the week. Regardless of this, I was down 3.3 pounds Monday morning!)
Sunday I woke up at eleven which is almost unheard of. Did 3 miles on the treadmill in my new sneaks! I love them! I can't wait until it warms up outside. I hate the treadmill, but am definately not going to brave the SK windchill.
Monday night I did another 3 miles on the treadmill. It was terrible. I didn't wait long enough after eating to run and I felt like puking the whole time. Lesson learned.
Last night I did the 30 day shred. It kicks my butt every time. I will do it faithfully twice, and then stop for months on end. I need to stop this! I've never made it to level two!
I'm taking the night off from exercise because...D is home! First night together since Saturday.
As for food this week, it's been kind of boring. I'm really enjoying jam and cheese sandwiches! Tonight's supper takes the cake.
EZ Chicken Tortilla Bake (adapted from a cookbook D got me for Christmas that doesn't really have a title)
can of condensed tomato soup
1/2C skim milk
1C salsa
2C cooked chicken (or 1.5C if that's all you can get off the damn bird)
1C cheese, divided
8 med. tortillas, cut into 1 inch pieces
Preheat oven to 400*. Mix together soup, milk, salsa, chicken, tortillas, and 1/2C of the cheese in a 2 quart baking dish. (1.5 is definately too small.) Cover and bake for 30 minutes. Top with remaining 1/2C cheese. Serves 4.
Thursday, January 27, 2011
The One With the Categories
Food
B-fast: 3/4C Honey Nut Cheerios, 1/2C Go Lean Crunch, splash of Almond Breeze.
Mid-morning: wished for a piece of fruit (noted!)
Lunch: Tuna pita (2nd time this week), banana, 2 Breaktime Chocolate Chip Cookies with PB on them (oh...my...God...)
Supper: 1/2C Vegetarian Baked Beans, Crustless Broccoli Quiche, roasted broccoli and butternut squash, 2 pieces of Turkey Bacon.
Workout
40 min wog on the treadmill. Sweaty...beast...
Groceries
again? Yes. I spent my lunch planning meals and making a(nother) grocery list (I'm also working on not feeling guilty for buying groceries all...the...time. Post for another day!) D is playing hockey 5 out of the next 6 nights. Normally when he's going to be gone I just wing it. This morning I thought "why wouldn't I plan meals for myself? I'm the one who cares what we eat!". So I sat down with cookbooks and meal planner (that I found this morning) and prepped. I incorporated leftovers, D being home, and a trip to Regina and now I'm good to go for another week.
Normally when I wing it, I slide off track and then it all goes downhill from there. Considering I really want a pita and fries with tzatziki from Opa! when we're in Regina, I best be good for the rest of the week.
Fridays are hard days for me. We always go for breakfast Friday mornings and I can never resist getting eggs and bacon. At lunchtime I usually not hungry so I have an iced coffee or some (weak) smoothie, and then when I get home from work (usually early) I eat a bunch of crap cuz I'm so hungry and have no plan for supper!
Anywho, here's what I got today.
Chocolate Almond Breeze
2% milk
Kidney Beans
Waters
Black Beans
Tomato soup X 2
Low fat cream of Broc soup
Vegetarian Baked Beans
Tuna X 2
Canned Black Olives
Sun Dried Tomatoes in Oil
Pillsbury Biscuit dough
Lunch Meat
Turkey Bacon
Shredded Cheese
Broccoli Crowns (which were a full dollar less per pound than bulk!)
5lb bag carrots
Snap Peas
Kale (the blog world has been full of kale chips. I'm cautiously curious)
B-Russell Sprouts
Organic Baby Spinach
Whole Wheat Pitas
Tortillas
Sliced Mushrooms
Potatoes
Red Onion
I'm really hoping that I only need to go to the store one time between now and next Friday, and that should only be for apples and bananas. It better be.
Thoughts
I'm feeling really good about things today.
Plus I get to see my bffs on Saturday for bridesmaid dress shopping! :D
B-fast: 3/4C Honey Nut Cheerios, 1/2C Go Lean Crunch, splash of Almond Breeze.
Mid-morning: wished for a piece of fruit (noted!)
Lunch: Tuna pita (2nd time this week), banana, 2 Breaktime Chocolate Chip Cookies with PB on them (oh...my...God...)
Supper: 1/2C Vegetarian Baked Beans, Crustless Broccoli Quiche, roasted broccoli and butternut squash, 2 pieces of Turkey Bacon.
Workout
40 min wog on the treadmill. Sweaty...beast...
Groceries
again? Yes. I spent my lunch planning meals and making a(nother) grocery list (I'm also working on not feeling guilty for buying groceries all...the...time. Post for another day!) D is playing hockey 5 out of the next 6 nights. Normally when he's going to be gone I just wing it. This morning I thought "why wouldn't I plan meals for myself? I'm the one who cares what we eat!". So I sat down with cookbooks and meal planner (that I found this morning) and prepped. I incorporated leftovers, D being home, and a trip to Regina and now I'm good to go for another week.
Normally when I wing it, I slide off track and then it all goes downhill from there. Considering I really want a pita and fries with tzatziki from Opa! when we're in Regina, I best be good for the rest of the week.
Fridays are hard days for me. We always go for breakfast Friday mornings and I can never resist getting eggs and bacon. At lunchtime I usually not hungry so I have an iced coffee or some (weak) smoothie, and then when I get home from work (usually early) I eat a bunch of crap cuz I'm so hungry and have no plan for supper!
Anywho, here's what I got today.
Chocolate Almond Breeze
2% milk
Kidney Beans
Waters
Black Beans
Tomato soup X 2
Low fat cream of Broc soup
Vegetarian Baked Beans
Tuna X 2
Canned Black Olives
Sun Dried Tomatoes in Oil
Pillsbury Biscuit dough
Lunch Meat
Turkey Bacon
Shredded Cheese
Broccoli Crowns (which were a full dollar less per pound than bulk!)
5lb bag carrots
Snap Peas
Kale (the blog world has been full of kale chips. I'm cautiously curious)
B-Russell Sprouts
Organic Baby Spinach
Whole Wheat Pitas
Tortillas
Sliced Mushrooms
Potatoes
Red Onion
I'm really hoping that I only need to go to the store one time between now and next Friday, and that should only be for apples and bananas. It better be.
Thoughts
I'm feeling really good about things today.
Plus I get to see my bffs on Saturday for bridesmaid dress shopping! :D
Wednesday, January 26, 2011
I Heart B-Russell
That's not the only Russell I heart!
It must be said that tonight's supper rocked my face.
Roasted brussell sprouts are awesome.
That is all.
It must be said that tonight's supper rocked my face.
Roasted brussell sprouts are awesome.
That is all.
The One Who Works Over Lunch
Missing most of the day yesterday had put me way behind. It's all paperwork, but depends on a bunch of other people for it to be finished. Luckily, I'm hoping to get everything done in the next few hours and go home at 4:00 to workout. Guess things aren't that bad *winky face*
I'm still not feeling 100%, but today it's almost like I can't get enough to eat. But I'm kinda scared to eat too much. Catch 22 much?
Today's b-fast: sucked. Protein shake and a banana. Held me over for about 45 mins. (I knew that would be the case, but didn't feel like making anything last night. Must get back on an oatmeal kick!
Lunch: Brought to you by Subway. An oven-roasted chicken breast salad made with iceberg, spinach, tomatoes, cucumbers, black olives, salt, pepper, sweet onion sauce...oh yeah, and chicken (they almost forgot that part). Also tomato and vegetable with rotini soup an apple and a Nestea Zero.
Snack will include something.
Supper is sweet and sour pork with minute rice (my fave!) and roasted B-Russell sprouts. I'm kind of excited about it. Never made the pork or sprouts before!
I need to drink water. I feel like I haven't had any since Sunday (hungover) and that's probably right. I'll put it on my to do list!
Pennie Lane
I'm still not feeling 100%, but today it's almost like I can't get enough to eat. But I'm kinda scared to eat too much. Catch 22 much?
Today's b-fast: sucked. Protein shake and a banana. Held me over for about 45 mins. (I knew that would be the case, but didn't feel like making anything last night. Must get back on an oatmeal kick!
Lunch: Brought to you by Subway. An oven-roasted chicken breast salad made with iceberg, spinach, tomatoes, cucumbers, black olives, salt, pepper, sweet onion sauce...oh yeah, and chicken (they almost forgot that part). Also tomato and vegetable with rotini soup an apple and a Nestea Zero.
Snack will include something.
Supper is sweet and sour pork with minute rice (my fave!) and roasted B-Russell sprouts. I'm kind of excited about it. Never made the pork or sprouts before!
I need to drink water. I feel like I haven't had any since Sunday (hungover) and that's probably right. I'll put it on my to do list!
Pennie Lane
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
The One With the Questionable Stomach
Last night's Chicken and Biscuits were sub-par. I think there were too many vegetables and too little chicken. Meh.
Today's eats have been all over the place because I started the day feeling fine, but by 10:30 I was dizzy, off balance, and felt like someone was using my stomach as a stress ball. I'm not convinced it's not the flu, but I haven't been sick, nor have I been in the bathroom all day. I'm hoping it's just a weird one day kind of thing and I'm fine tomorrow. I have way too much work to do to be sick right now!
On today's plate...
Breakfast -- a cup and some of the frozen summer fruit salad blend I picked up yesterday (strawberries, pineapple, grapes, honeydew...maybe something else) with vanilla yogurt on top. Put in the fridge overnight so the fruit melts and sweetens the yogurt (this works really well with raspberries and plain yogurt). Then I added a bit of agave nectar and half a cup of Kashi Go Lean Crunch to it this morning. I don't know what went wrong but this morning I had frozen yogurt!! The berries were still kind of frozen too. That never happens! It was good, once everything melted.
Lunch -- today's lunch was in two parts. Part one was at 12 and was a can (yes, the whole can) of Campbell's new Light chicken noodle soup. And Light it was. I've had the garden minestrone before (half the can) with a salad and it's satisfied me. Not today. By 1:30 I was pretty sure the cramps were from hunger so I rolled out of bed (upsetting the cat in the process. Sorry Roger) and had a piece of toast. Got back into bed. Ten minutes later I had another piece of toast, a cheese string, and some turkey lunch meat! This filled me up a little bit more.
Snack -- if you can call it that, was a banana whilst making supper.
Supper -- "Classic Macaroni and Cheese". It was really good. I always add chopped tomatoes and green onions to my mac and cheese (can't for the life of me remember why or when this started). I used real butter, 2% milk, and part-skim cheese. Then I ran out of part-skim and had to use light, which doesn't melt worth a crap. Next time it's part-skim or full fat all the way. I was going to sub skim milk for 2% but it wouldn't have been nearly as creamy. I also had a few handfuls of sugar snap peas and a couple radishes.
Not sure what the night-time snack will be. Probably something with peanut butter (Unhealthy addiction) I'll probably also finish off the rest of the 2 litre of diet 7-up I picked up this morning. Mmm...aspertame...
That's all for now folks.
Pennie Lane
Happy birthday Dear Scott, happy birthday to you.
Today's eats have been all over the place because I started the day feeling fine, but by 10:30 I was dizzy, off balance, and felt like someone was using my stomach as a stress ball. I'm not convinced it's not the flu, but I haven't been sick, nor have I been in the bathroom all day. I'm hoping it's just a weird one day kind of thing and I'm fine tomorrow. I have way too much work to do to be sick right now!
On today's plate...
Breakfast -- a cup and some of the frozen summer fruit salad blend I picked up yesterday (strawberries, pineapple, grapes, honeydew...maybe something else) with vanilla yogurt on top. Put in the fridge overnight so the fruit melts and sweetens the yogurt (this works really well with raspberries and plain yogurt). Then I added a bit of agave nectar and half a cup of Kashi Go Lean Crunch to it this morning. I don't know what went wrong but this morning I had frozen yogurt!! The berries were still kind of frozen too. That never happens! It was good, once everything melted.
Lunch -- today's lunch was in two parts. Part one was at 12 and was a can (yes, the whole can) of Campbell's new Light chicken noodle soup. And Light it was. I've had the garden minestrone before (half the can) with a salad and it's satisfied me. Not today. By 1:30 I was pretty sure the cramps were from hunger so I rolled out of bed (upsetting the cat in the process. Sorry Roger) and had a piece of toast. Got back into bed. Ten minutes later I had another piece of toast, a cheese string, and some turkey lunch meat! This filled me up a little bit more.
Snack -- if you can call it that, was a banana whilst making supper.
Supper -- "Classic Macaroni and Cheese". It was really good. I always add chopped tomatoes and green onions to my mac and cheese (can't for the life of me remember why or when this started). I used real butter, 2% milk, and part-skim cheese. Then I ran out of part-skim and had to use light, which doesn't melt worth a crap. Next time it's part-skim or full fat all the way. I was going to sub skim milk for 2% but it wouldn't have been nearly as creamy. I also had a few handfuls of sugar snap peas and a couple radishes.
Not sure what the night-time snack will be. Probably something with peanut butter (Unhealthy addiction) I'll probably also finish off the rest of the 2 litre of diet 7-up I picked up this morning. Mmm...aspertame...
That's all for now folks.
Pennie Lane
Happy birthday Dear Scott, happy birthday to you.
Monday, January 24, 2011
Shopping List
In an effort to reign in my spending on groceries, I'm going to try (to remember) to post my (hopefully) weekly shopping trips. I'm also going to try to note anything that expires/gets thrown away. If I see it on a list, maybe I'll learn how to shop better!
My biggest problem is actually with produce. I like to have different kinds of fruits and vegetables around. I eat a lot of salads and I like a lot of stuff in them! I also try to eat a lot of fruit, and it gets old eating just apples 3+ times a day. Unfortunately, sometimes I go way overboard and buy enough for a house of 5. Which we are not. We are a 1 person who eats fruit and vegetables household.
In this week's cart: (* means on sale)
2% milk for D (and Roger)
Skim milk for me
Chocolate Chip Cookies
*Frozen fruit summer salad
Green Giant Frozen Mixed Veggies
Shredded Marble Cheese
Romaine hearts
*Butternut Squash ----> I'm being brave. And trying to eat one new vegetable each month. I'm counting squash as a vegetable whether it is or not.
*Snap peas
Bananas
Roasted Garlic Hummus
*Radishes
*Green Onions
*Jazz Apples
*Tomatoes
Whole Wheat Pitas
Salad Bar Vegetables X 2
This is a funny week because I pretty much just needed produce. I'm using last week's meal plan and bought all the stuff last week! I'm not sure I planned ahead for lunches (I always forget this part!) so there will likely be salads with peanut butter pitas!
Supper time! My stomach is trying to eat itself!
PL
My biggest problem is actually with produce. I like to have different kinds of fruits and vegetables around. I eat a lot of salads and I like a lot of stuff in them! I also try to eat a lot of fruit, and it gets old eating just apples 3+ times a day. Unfortunately, sometimes I go way overboard and buy enough for a house of 5. Which we are not. We are a 1 person who eats fruit and vegetables household.
In this week's cart: (* means on sale)
2% milk for D (and Roger)
Skim milk for me
Chocolate Chip Cookies
*Frozen fruit summer salad
Green Giant Frozen Mixed Veggies
Shredded Marble Cheese
Romaine hearts
*Butternut Squash ----> I'm being brave. And trying to eat one new vegetable each month. I'm counting squash as a vegetable whether it is or not.
*Snap peas
Bananas
Roasted Garlic Hummus
*Radishes
*Green Onions
*Jazz Apples
*Tomatoes
Whole Wheat Pitas
Salad Bar Vegetables X 2
This is a funny week because I pretty much just needed produce. I'm using last week's meal plan and bought all the stuff last week! I'm not sure I planned ahead for lunches (I always forget this part!) so there will likely be salads with peanut butter pitas!
Supper time! My stomach is trying to eat itself!
PL
For Riz
After a week of emotional eating, Smarties for breakfast, and absolutely zero exercise, I'm back and am more determined than ever. Eating chocolate dainties and drinking my body weight in beer and wine (which, naturally, lead to BK yesterday) won't make me feel better. It won't make me feel better about having to come back. In fact, eating like crap makes me feel like crap. For a few years I self-diagnosed myself with IBS. Every time I ate, I needed to use the bathroom immediately after. Two years ago as of Feb. 14 I stopped eating crap, started exercising, lost 40 pounds, and realized I didn't have a disease -- terrible food was the disease!! I'm not saying I'm going to stop eating everything bad for me (where's the fun in that?) but I want to make conscious decisions to put premium fuel in my tank. Eating well makes me feel good, end of story.
So on that note, here's what's hittin the palate today. I had to wing breakfast and lunch, and will hit up the grocery store after work.
Breakfast: Pink lady apple (my faves!) and a Nature Valley chocolate chip granola bar thing. (Def. not worth the five points, but I forgot to make overnight oats last night, and was in a hurry this am. Was only going to have 1 of the 2 bars that come in the pack, but changed my mind.
Workout: Snuck out of work at 11 and came home to do a 40 minute wog on the treadmill whilst watching Dragon's Den. 5 minute warm-up then alternating 90 seconds jogging with 2 mins walking.
Lunch: Protein shake (1 cup skim milk, 1 scoop Vanilla Whey Gourmet protein powder. Tuna salad (1 can of tuna, coleslaw dressing bc I don't like mayo, celery, relish, onion salt, garlic powder) on a few romaine lettuce leaves.) I might have an orange or something too.
Not sure what my snack will be. Potentially nothing today.
Supper is Homestyle Chicken and Biscuits. If it tastes good, I'll try to remember to post the recipe tomorrow.
I'm hoping to shovel some snow after work (after groceries...ugh) because we're going to have a swimming pool in the basement come spring. Not convinced this will happen today.
What's ahead on Pennie's Lane?
I had a discussion with D's sister-in-law (my sister-in-law-in-law?) Saturday night. She's a marathoner and runs all the time. We've decided to register for 2 races together. I'm pretty sure I'm freakin NUTS! The first race is Melissa's and is in Banff. The race isn't until the fall, but registration is sometime in Feb, and if you don't register the first day, you don't get in. Did I mention this is a 10k? Yes, 10k. That's 5 more km than Preston's Road Race, and 4 more than the MS Walk (yes, WALK).
The second is a whole year from now. It's the Disney Princess Half-marathon. First half in Disney World dressed like a Princess? Why not! We figure the four of us can take a trip that just happens to land right smack in the middle of the race.
I've got oodles of time to train for both of these, and I figure why not. Ten km is essentially about an hour. I can do anything for an hour. And if I can't, I can do anything for ten minutes 6 times. I've never done a race before, just fun-runs. I figure registering for these will keep me committed to losing weight and learning to run.
Right now I plan to continue the Couch to 5K plan. I was doing really well with it until winter came. I'm scared of breaking my leg outside. I'm still scared, so the treadmill will have to do for a month or two more.
Phew! Lots to say today!
Pennie Lane
So on that note, here's what's hittin the palate today. I had to wing breakfast and lunch, and will hit up the grocery store after work.
Breakfast: Pink lady apple (my faves!) and a Nature Valley chocolate chip granola bar thing. (Def. not worth the five points, but I forgot to make overnight oats last night, and was in a hurry this am. Was only going to have 1 of the 2 bars that come in the pack, but changed my mind.
Workout: Snuck out of work at 11 and came home to do a 40 minute wog on the treadmill whilst watching Dragon's Den. 5 minute warm-up then alternating 90 seconds jogging with 2 mins walking.
Lunch: Protein shake (1 cup skim milk, 1 scoop Vanilla Whey Gourmet protein powder. Tuna salad (1 can of tuna, coleslaw dressing bc I don't like mayo, celery, relish, onion salt, garlic powder) on a few romaine lettuce leaves.) I might have an orange or something too.
Not sure what my snack will be. Potentially nothing today.
Supper is Homestyle Chicken and Biscuits. If it tastes good, I'll try to remember to post the recipe tomorrow.
I'm hoping to shovel some snow after work (after groceries...ugh) because we're going to have a swimming pool in the basement come spring. Not convinced this will happen today.
What's ahead on Pennie's Lane?
I had a discussion with D's sister-in-law (my sister-in-law-in-law?) Saturday night. She's a marathoner and runs all the time. We've decided to register for 2 races together. I'm pretty sure I'm freakin NUTS! The first race is Melissa's and is in Banff. The race isn't until the fall, but registration is sometime in Feb, and if you don't register the first day, you don't get in. Did I mention this is a 10k? Yes, 10k. That's 5 more km than Preston's Road Race, and 4 more than the MS Walk (yes, WALK).
The second is a whole year from now. It's the Disney Princess Half-marathon. First half in Disney World dressed like a Princess? Why not! We figure the four of us can take a trip that just happens to land right smack in the middle of the race.
I've got oodles of time to train for both of these, and I figure why not. Ten km is essentially about an hour. I can do anything for an hour. And if I can't, I can do anything for ten minutes 6 times. I've never done a race before, just fun-runs. I figure registering for these will keep me committed to losing weight and learning to run.
Right now I plan to continue the Couch to 5K plan. I was doing really well with it until winter came. I'm scared of breaking my leg outside. I'm still scared, so the treadmill will have to do for a month or two more.
Phew! Lots to say today!
Pennie Lane
Monday, January 17, 2011
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
TableTop
Hello!
Not much going on here today. It's -25 plus a wind chill. Would be a great day to put on sweats and chill in the basement with the cat. But sadly, there are airwaves to be sold (or at the very least, a desk to be sat at).
Here's what I'm eating today.
B-fast: 2 mini pitas with peanut butter and apple butter (this PB obsession is getting dangerous) and a banana
Lunch: Homemade veg soup. I should post the recipe because it's. that. good. It's also quick and easy to make. Even quicker when you don't have to put away clean dishes and wash the soup pot first.
(Roger just stepped on the "delete" key and licked my finger. It was cute. I gave him some milk for it.)
Ah yes. Soup. Plus a delish salad full of romaine, mushrooms, carrot, celery, red & green pepper, olives, cauliflower, broc, cut up cheese string and calorie wise catalina. I don't discriminate when it comes to salads. My grocery store has a salad bar and it's fantastic. I'm there every Tues on biz'nis, so I usually stop by and load up on already cut veggies to put on the lettuce I have at home. I also tried a veggie dog on a whole wheat bun with ket + rel. It wasn't very good. I will eat the remaining 5, but will not buy them again. Plus, it turns out I just like bun with ketchup and relish. Who knew?
I also might have some grapes.
I haven't thought far enough ahead for snack or supper. Fruit and crackers maybe. And a hamburger and curly fries for supper? I don't feel like having to exert myself in the kitchen tonight so we'll see.
Hasta luego!
Pennie Lane
Not much going on here today. It's -25 plus a wind chill. Would be a great day to put on sweats and chill in the basement with the cat. But sadly, there are airwaves to be sold (or at the very least, a desk to be sat at).
Here's what I'm eating today.
B-fast: 2 mini pitas with peanut butter and apple butter (this PB obsession is getting dangerous) and a banana
Lunch: Homemade veg soup. I should post the recipe because it's. that. good. It's also quick and easy to make. Even quicker when you don't have to put away clean dishes and wash the soup pot first.
(Roger just stepped on the "delete" key and licked my finger. It was cute. I gave him some milk for it.)
Ah yes. Soup. Plus a delish salad full of romaine, mushrooms, carrot, celery, red & green pepper, olives, cauliflower, broc, cut up cheese string and calorie wise catalina. I don't discriminate when it comes to salads. My grocery store has a salad bar and it's fantastic. I'm there every Tues on biz'nis, so I usually stop by and load up on already cut veggies to put on the lettuce I have at home. I also tried a veggie dog on a whole wheat bun with ket + rel. It wasn't very good. I will eat the remaining 5, but will not buy them again. Plus, it turns out I just like bun with ketchup and relish. Who knew?
I also might have some grapes.
I haven't thought far enough ahead for snack or supper. Fruit and crackers maybe. And a hamburger and curly fries for supper? I don't feel like having to exert myself in the kitchen tonight so we'll see.
Hasta luego!
Pennie Lane
Monday, January 10, 2011
If you care to know what I'm eating today...
...read on!
Breakfast -- 1C of Kashi Go Lean (was on sale...me likey) and an apple
Lunch - deconstructed tuna pita. (Tuna with celery, relish, coleslaw dressing, onion salt with a pita on the side.) Banana
Snack - yogurt and a protein shake (a scoop of vanilla protein powder + 1C Unsweetened Vanilla Almond Breeze {UVAB})
Sups - (sponsored by M& M Meats) Applewood Smoke & Maple Salmon with stir-fried veggies and rice
The plan is to get a few groceries after work then hit up the treadmill for 40 mins. Oh yeah, and make soup. D works until 6 today, so if I sneak outta work early, the timing should be perfect.
Roger is trying to eat my tuna. Silly kitty.
Breakfast -- 1C of Kashi Go Lean (was on sale...me likey) and an apple
Lunch - deconstructed tuna pita. (Tuna with celery, relish, coleslaw dressing, onion salt with a pita on the side.) Banana
Snack - yogurt and a protein shake (a scoop of vanilla protein powder + 1C Unsweetened Vanilla Almond Breeze {UVAB})
Sups - (sponsored by M& M Meats) Applewood Smoke & Maple Salmon with stir-fried veggies and rice
The plan is to get a few groceries after work then hit up the treadmill for 40 mins. Oh yeah, and make soup. D works until 6 today, so if I sneak outta work early, the timing should be perfect.
Roger is trying to eat my tuna. Silly kitty.
Weekend? What weekend?
I spent the weekend at D's parents' house. That means not only did I eat like shat, I feel like I didn't get a weekend! I thought about coming home Saturday afternoon, but quickly got rid of that notion. Five to fifteen cm of snow and 50km winds? No thank you. I'm proud to say I did 30 mins on the treadmill Saturday, and that doesn't usually happen when I'm there. (I also shoveled snow for 30 mins when I got home yesterday)
Despite eating 2/3 of a 9X13 pan of taco dip by myself, I lost 1.2 pounds last week. I ate really good Monday to Friday afternoon and exercised a few times. I need to figure something out. My problem is weekends that I'm not at home. If I'm at home, I'm ok. When I'm not, I go into holiday mode and eat my face off. If I have any hope of being where I want to be by July, I need to stop this. D has hockey every Friday and Saturday until at least the middle of February. If I continue to eat well during the week and then boycot vegetables on the weekend it will take forever to lose this weight.
To "fix" this, I could just stay home instead of going to the hockey games. While, in theory, that cures the bad eating, it also leaves me alone for almost the entire weekend. Loneliness often leads to mindless eating. So I could possibly end up eating just as much, but all alone!
Seems like a catch 22. I guess I just need to be 100% committed. I don't feel guilty about eating the way I did on the weekend. I went to H-ville knowing I was going to! I just know that the number on the scale could have been lower.
Oh well. Enough about that. In two weeks I get to meet my beautiful bridesmaids in Reg to look for dresses and I can't wait!! We're getting married six months from yesterday. There is so much to do. We're having a slight problem figuring out supper. This is where the SW and SE differ. My parents think that if everyone is driving 2 hours to the darn thing, we should feed them. D and his parents think that if we do that, they won't invite most of their friends. (If they aren't close enough to be fed, why do they get an invite??) I don't care what we do. I also don't know how to tell the people who are paying for it "no". It's annoying, and while I don't want to talk about it right now, we got the proofs for our invitations back on Friday and will have to make a decision on supper shortly. Luckily, this is the only snag we've come across, and for the most part I'm laid-back about the planning. (This is very unlike me, but at the end of the day, D and I will be married. The rest doesn't really matter)
Wow, long-winded, unimportant post!
Later!
Pennie Lane
Despite eating 2/3 of a 9X13 pan of taco dip by myself, I lost 1.2 pounds last week. I ate really good Monday to Friday afternoon and exercised a few times. I need to figure something out. My problem is weekends that I'm not at home. If I'm at home, I'm ok. When I'm not, I go into holiday mode and eat my face off. If I have any hope of being where I want to be by July, I need to stop this. D has hockey every Friday and Saturday until at least the middle of February. If I continue to eat well during the week and then boycot vegetables on the weekend it will take forever to lose this weight.
To "fix" this, I could just stay home instead of going to the hockey games. While, in theory, that cures the bad eating, it also leaves me alone for almost the entire weekend. Loneliness often leads to mindless eating. So I could possibly end up eating just as much, but all alone!
Seems like a catch 22. I guess I just need to be 100% committed. I don't feel guilty about eating the way I did on the weekend. I went to H-ville knowing I was going to! I just know that the number on the scale could have been lower.
Oh well. Enough about that. In two weeks I get to meet my beautiful bridesmaids in Reg to look for dresses and I can't wait!! We're getting married six months from yesterday. There is so much to do. We're having a slight problem figuring out supper. This is where the SW and SE differ. My parents think that if everyone is driving 2 hours to the darn thing, we should feed them. D and his parents think that if we do that, they won't invite most of their friends. (If they aren't close enough to be fed, why do they get an invite??) I don't care what we do. I also don't know how to tell the people who are paying for it "no". It's annoying, and while I don't want to talk about it right now, we got the proofs for our invitations back on Friday and will have to make a decision on supper shortly. Luckily, this is the only snag we've come across, and for the most part I'm laid-back about the planning. (This is very unlike me, but at the end of the day, D and I will be married. The rest doesn't really matter)
Wow, long-winded, unimportant post!
Later!
Pennie Lane
Friday, January 7, 2011
Down With Guilt!
Roger says hey.
This will be short, but sweet. And I'm MIA all weekend. 3 days + 3 hockey games = ? (D's mom's taco dip, if nothing else great!)
Just watched a short segment from Eat, Pray, Love. Julia Roberts had a relationship with her pizza. I love the idea behind that. Why wake up and obsess over every single morsel that touched your tongue the day before, just so you can feel bad about it??
I'm not very good at living for the moment, but sometimes I go through crazy thoughts: the age old "you could die tomorrow". Why save money? Money is meant to be spent! Eat everything! Forget about people who suck the positive energy out of you!
But then the responsible part of me kicks in, because if we have babies, there has to be money. And D and I are going to live to be 96 and 100, so it will be nice to be able to retire and afford things.
My two cents for the day. I'm not saying we should all eat crap and be obese, but I think we need to forget about feeling guilty. If it makes you happy, how can it make you feel guilty at the same time?
I'm having dessert.
Pennie Lane
This will be short, but sweet. And I'm MIA all weekend. 3 days + 3 hockey games = ? (D's mom's taco dip, if nothing else great!)
Just watched a short segment from Eat, Pray, Love. Julia Roberts had a relationship with her pizza. I love the idea behind that. Why wake up and obsess over every single morsel that touched your tongue the day before, just so you can feel bad about it??
I'm not very good at living for the moment, but sometimes I go through crazy thoughts: the age old "you could die tomorrow". Why save money? Money is meant to be spent! Eat everything! Forget about people who suck the positive energy out of you!
But then the responsible part of me kicks in, because if we have babies, there has to be money. And D and I are going to live to be 96 and 100, so it will be nice to be able to retire and afford things.
My two cents for the day. I'm not saying we should all eat crap and be obese, but I think we need to forget about feeling guilty. If it makes you happy, how can it make you feel guilty at the same time?
I'm having dessert.
Pennie Lane
Thursday, January 6, 2011
Can I go nowhere with you?
I think I finally understand what Rodney Atkins meant when he sang "Things go from bad to worse, you'd think they can't get worse than that, and then they do".
The main reason I didn't want to move 4.5 hours from home has happened. When going over the pros and cons of moving, one of the cons was that I'd be so far away if something happened. What if Dad got hurt? What if Mom got sick? What if one of my friends needed me there? It's too long for an after work trip. It's too far to be there as fast as I'd like to be there.
I know that by being *there* there would be nothing for me to do. There's nothing I could say or do that would change what's happening. But maybe I could look after some kids with red hair so their mom could could take time to herself to cry. I could physically hug her, instead of just sending them out into the universe and hoping she gets them. I could make her some toast when she's hungry but doesn't have the energy to make it herself. I could just do anything she would ever need done and feel like I'm doing something worth doing.
But I can't be there. I have to go to work each day. I sit at my desk, cell phone within reach, feeling sick to my stomach every time it makes a noise. Life is going on. I wish time had frozen the day before the headaches came. I wish people understood that there are worse things in life. Your bad day is nothing. It's all relative, but I envy the people whose bad day is sleeping in and getting a speeding ticket. That's not a bad day. That's an inconvenience. Talk to me when the person you love most in the world is taken away from you. Talk to me when the most you can do in one day is get out of bed and walk to the post office. Talk to me when people pass you on the street and don't make eye contact because they can't handle talking to you.
I'm not trying to make it about me. It's not about me. It's about so many other people than me. I don't know what you're going through. I don't know how you feel. What I hated most when I went through hell (besides the sympathetic head tilt and the word "journey") was people saying "I know how you feel/I know what you're going through".
Oh? I respectfully disagree!!
What's the point to this post, you ask? There is no point. I needed to get it out. I needed to say it without anyone hearing it. I needed to be able to delete and reword before I was ready to hit publish.
And it's not about what I need right now.
All I can do is love you to pieces.
Love,
Pennie (Lane)
"Well it's empty and ugly
And terribly sad.
I can't feel what you feel,
But I know it feels bad."
The main reason I didn't want to move 4.5 hours from home has happened. When going over the pros and cons of moving, one of the cons was that I'd be so far away if something happened. What if Dad got hurt? What if Mom got sick? What if one of my friends needed me there? It's too long for an after work trip. It's too far to be there as fast as I'd like to be there.
I know that by being *there* there would be nothing for me to do. There's nothing I could say or do that would change what's happening. But maybe I could look after some kids with red hair so their mom could could take time to herself to cry. I could physically hug her, instead of just sending them out into the universe and hoping she gets them. I could make her some toast when she's hungry but doesn't have the energy to make it herself. I could just do anything she would ever need done and feel like I'm doing something worth doing.
But I can't be there. I have to go to work each day. I sit at my desk, cell phone within reach, feeling sick to my stomach every time it makes a noise. Life is going on. I wish time had frozen the day before the headaches came. I wish people understood that there are worse things in life. Your bad day is nothing. It's all relative, but I envy the people whose bad day is sleeping in and getting a speeding ticket. That's not a bad day. That's an inconvenience. Talk to me when the person you love most in the world is taken away from you. Talk to me when the most you can do in one day is get out of bed and walk to the post office. Talk to me when people pass you on the street and don't make eye contact because they can't handle talking to you.
I'm not trying to make it about me. It's not about me. It's about so many other people than me. I don't know what you're going through. I don't know how you feel. What I hated most when I went through hell (besides the sympathetic head tilt and the word "journey") was people saying "I know how you feel/I know what you're going through".
Oh? I respectfully disagree!!
What's the point to this post, you ask? There is no point. I needed to get it out. I needed to say it without anyone hearing it. I needed to be able to delete and reword before I was ready to hit publish.
And it's not about what I need right now.
All I can do is love you to pieces.
Love,
Pennie (Lane)
"Well it's empty and ugly
And terribly sad.
I can't feel what you feel,
But I know it feels bad."
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
Snackasaurus
My snack is blogworthy and I must share.
After a lovely little 60 min walk/jog (more walk than jog. lungs screamed) I had a banana sliced with cherry yogurt. With a side of pita slathered in peanut butter and apple butter.
So...good....
PL
After a lovely little 60 min walk/jog (more walk than jog. lungs screamed) I had a banana sliced with cherry yogurt. With a side of pita slathered in peanut butter and apple butter.
So...good....
PL
Food, Glorious Food!
I don't like to mention to many people that I'm an official Weight Watcher, but one can definately tell that I went from heavier to lighter to heavier again. I got there somehow. I lost 40 pounds with WW points system and am back with the pointsplus program. I love it. 0 point bananas? Sign me up!
When I'm back to watching what I eat, I'm a closet over-weigher. Not like 3 times a day, but a couple extra times a week I like to make sure that what I'm doing is paying off. Especially in the beginning, when I expect a bigger loss. Like this morning for example. My official weigh-in for the week was Monday. So two days later I jump on the scale...and am down 3.4 pounds. This is why it pays to care. After feeling badly about how I look for the past six months, I have recommitted, and know I'm going to follow it through. I'm even excited to sweat! I have to tell myself that until I'm better, it will only make it worse.
So in the interest of being excited about what I'm eating and the new WW program (and in an effort to get me to keep up with this blog) I'm going to try posting my daily eats.
I'll start with yesterday because I think I remember it.
B-fast: Plain yogurt, blueberries, gross-o Muesli cereal
Lunch: Salad with a bit of leftover chicken and ham. Homemade veg soup.
Snack: Apple with peanut butter (I'm so loving peanut butter right now!)
Supper: M&M Meats Ginger Chicken bowl. (not a fan). Salad.
Snack: Blended frozen raspberries and strawberries with a glug of almond breeze and a squirt of honey. Popcorn.
And I had a banana at some point.
Today.
I'm hungry today. I contribute it to the unappetizing, unfilling supper last night. I'm craving lots of vegetables. And a burger...
B-fast: Plain yogurt, strawberries, gross-o Muesli cereal (this will remain gross-o until it's gone. I wish D would eat it)
Lunch: Salad with chicken, half a pita, vegetables, pear.
Snack: Watermelon. Triscuit thin crisps (Parmesan-Garlic, AKA deliciousness in a triangle)
Supper: I'm really excited about this. Half a pita, burger, curly fries. Probably salad. All tracked and accounted for.
That's about all I know today. Happy eating!
PennieLane
When I'm back to watching what I eat, I'm a closet over-weigher. Not like 3 times a day, but a couple extra times a week I like to make sure that what I'm doing is paying off. Especially in the beginning, when I expect a bigger loss. Like this morning for example. My official weigh-in for the week was Monday. So two days later I jump on the scale...and am down 3.4 pounds. This is why it pays to care. After feeling badly about how I look for the past six months, I have recommitted, and know I'm going to follow it through. I'm even excited to sweat! I have to tell myself that until I'm better, it will only make it worse.
So in the interest of being excited about what I'm eating and the new WW program (and in an effort to get me to keep up with this blog) I'm going to try posting my daily eats.
I'll start with yesterday because I think I remember it.
B-fast: Plain yogurt, blueberries, gross-o Muesli cereal
Lunch: Salad with a bit of leftover chicken and ham. Homemade veg soup.
Snack: Apple with peanut butter (I'm so loving peanut butter right now!)
Supper: M&M Meats Ginger Chicken bowl. (not a fan). Salad.
Snack: Blended frozen raspberries and strawberries with a glug of almond breeze and a squirt of honey. Popcorn.
And I had a banana at some point.
Today.
I'm hungry today. I contribute it to the unappetizing, unfilling supper last night. I'm craving lots of vegetables. And a burger...
B-fast: Plain yogurt, strawberries, gross-o Muesli cereal (this will remain gross-o until it's gone. I wish D would eat it)
Lunch: Salad with chicken, half a pita, vegetables, pear.
Snack: Watermelon. Triscuit thin crisps (Parmesan-Garlic, AKA deliciousness in a triangle)
Supper: I'm really excited about this. Half a pita, burger, curly fries. Probably salad. All tracked and accounted for.
That's about all I know today. Happy eating!
PennieLane
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
Goals for 2011
Like half the world I'm resolving to do a few things differently in 2011. Since I'm not a huge fan of the word "resolution" (it signifies the end of something) I'm going with "goals".
Personal
* Worry less and stop assuming the worst. It comes with the territory, but it drives a person (and her fiance!) crazy. This is a huge step and it's going to be really hard, but it's something I need to do for my sanity!
* Be a better gf/fiance/wife. I don't like the word "better" but can't think of an adequate replacement. Ask fewer annoying questions. Say what I mean and mean what I say. Stop sweating the little things. Remember every day how lucky I am that D loves me, crazy and all.
* Learn more. We played Beatles Trivial Pursuit and I didn't know most of the answers. I want to.
Professional
* Accept what I cannot change and have the courage to change the things I can.
* Be HAPPY with what I'm doing.
* Make goals for Pampered Chef and do it!
Fitness / Health
* Weigh 25 pounds less than right now by July 9 (the wedding!)
* Run a 5K in 35 minutes or less
* Exercise 3 times per week for at least 30 minutes unless it will do more harm than good. (This week I'm not doing any. I've been sick for 6 days and my lungs won't be able to take it. Crazy, not stupid)
*Drink 8 glasses of water/coffee/tea each day. I'm also hoping this will help me drink less pop.
Personal
* Worry less and stop assuming the worst. It comes with the territory, but it drives a person (and her fiance!) crazy. This is a huge step and it's going to be really hard, but it's something I need to do for my sanity!
* Be a better gf/fiance/wife. I don't like the word "better" but can't think of an adequate replacement. Ask fewer annoying questions. Say what I mean and mean what I say. Stop sweating the little things. Remember every day how lucky I am that D loves me, crazy and all.
* Learn more. We played Beatles Trivial Pursuit and I didn't know most of the answers. I want to.
Professional
* Accept what I cannot change and have the courage to change the things I can.
* Be HAPPY with what I'm doing.
* Make goals for Pampered Chef and do it!
Fitness / Health
* Weigh 25 pounds less than right now by July 9 (the wedding!)
* Run a 5K in 35 minutes or less
* Exercise 3 times per week for at least 30 minutes unless it will do more harm than good. (This week I'm not doing any. I've been sick for 6 days and my lungs won't be able to take it. Crazy, not stupid)
*Drink 8 glasses of water/coffee/tea each day. I'm also hoping this will help me drink less pop.
Monday, January 3, 2011
A Fresh Start
I'm back. For the past 6 months I've stopped counting/caring what I've been eating and the weight has crept back on. I saw it coming. There were weeks, here and there, where I would track and exercise, but then something would happen. I'd get sick, there would be a celebration of some sort, or, you know, I'd want some ice cream.
So here I am. Six months until my wedding day and 35 pounds heavier than I would like to be. I love that it took a year to lose 40 and six months to gain most of it back.
I told myself that I could do whatever I wanted over Christmas (which included a lot of food, but also walks which made me feel a bit better) but come January I needed to be back at it.
It's not even entirely about the wedding. Sure, I have the prettiest dress ever made and I want to be smokin' hot, but it's more about how I feel. And how I know I CAN feel. I can try on one outfit and feel good, instead of trying on half a dozen and feeling mediocre. I can feel strong after exercising, instead of feeling like a soft mess.
I started learning how to run, and then winter came. I'm not really all about breaking my ankle, so I stopped. Our basement is pulled apart and the treadmill has been pushed into a corner. The exercise bike is shoved into another room. The couch is pulled away from the wall which leaves no exercise room.
I'm full of excuses, I know. But I'm also full of homemade vegetable soup, and a salad with chicken, which I just had for lunch. I know I can do it again, and I have a time goal in mind. If it doesn't happen before July 9, it's not the end of the world. It's a life-long process and the wedding is just one magnificent day. And at the end of that day, I will be married to D and it will happen no matter how much I weigh, and with or without sunshine.
Like I said, I'm back. With or without readers, this blog helped me before so I'm going to try to keep up with it.
One great thing I did was quit smoking, 3 months ago today. I feel fantastic about that, and I can't wait to get healthy without that little storm cloud hanging over my head.
Love, Peace, and Salads,
PennieLane
Love you HT.
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